Hurricane Milton #2

Good morning! Everyone is safe! No damage to K's parents' house though still no power. No flooding. In Ft. Myers, house stayed dry and power is on! We still don't know much about Sanibel other than fire trucks crossed the causeway to check on things. So that means the causeway is operational! And our neighbor sent some Ring footage showing water flooding the street last night and dry this morning. Also good. Not sure if we got water in the house. I believe power is out everywhere on Sanibel. We don't think anyone will be allowed onto Sanibel until tomorrow after the city deems it safe enough for folks to come back. We're waiting to hear from some friends in Sarasota/Tampa area on how things are on the ground there. Pray for K, that he gets a solid night's rest after all the stress and prep from the last several days. He has earned it!

Thanks to all for your notes and for checking in and for all the prayers. It has meant the world to us. 

mb

UPDATE: K is just returning from Sanibel and gave a great report. Our home is totally dry! No water in the house or in the garage! This is a HUGE praise. We thank God for this good report, especially as others got water in their homes yet again. So much devastation and chaos from storms like this. Praying for all of those who face displacement and grueling recovery and remediation in the days & months ahead. It's no small task to recover from a major storm.

Hurricane Milton

It’s crazy to be posting about yet another hurricane. This one is coming closer to us. Evacuation orders are in place for Sanibel and Ft Myers Beach (but not where we are in Ft Myers). Kids and I are en route to Indiana. K is staying. School is canceled for the entire week. We’ve buttoned up Sanibel as best we know how. Should be less surge than Ian. Praying that’s true. It’s supposed to make landfall Wednesday morning. Praying for our friends, our home, and those who don’t have a safe place to be. This is a big one. Will keep the blog updated as best I can. And of course will respond to texts and calls as best we can. 

Today is R’s 10th birthday! Text him a happy birthday message if you have a minute!

Hugs to all!

UPDATE: Evacuation mandates are in place for Sanibel, Fort Myers Beach, and now our area of Fort Myers (Flood Zones A & B...Sanibel/Ft. Myers Beach is flood zone A, our part of Ft. Myers is on the edge of A & B.) The surge projections are 6-10 feet for our county (Sanibel & Fort Myers) and 4-7 feet in Naples area. That's a lot of water. (As a point of comparison, Hurricane Ian had 15-ft surge & Hurricane Helene had about 5-1/2 feet of surge on Sanbiel.) Looks like the storm is very strong and has shifted a bit north. Looks like it's going straight through Tampa. Will know more tomorrow. 

UPDATE #2: A very specific prayer request (in addition to the storm just dissipating) is that peak surge occurs at low tide. Peak surge at high tide is very bad! And pray for “dry air to erode the southern eyewall.” 

Hurricane Helene #2

Hurricane Helene was a monster. Tragic. Horrible. Our hearts break for those farther up the coast & inland (!!) who got hit so very hard. Flooding, mudslides, wind, even loads of sand where it shouldn't be. When I see the huge Chinook helicopters in the videos and photos, my stomach knots up. I remember those. The damage is so hard to comprehend, to absorb. The damage which leads to displacement...trying to help, trying to remediate, trying to salvage and make sense of it all, all without water and power. It was a terrible thing to go through two years ago (today), and we are so sorry others are having to go through this. It's all so tender still for us. And that's probably the way it should be. Shouldn't we be walking through life with tender hearts, with empathy, with the desire to help others?

It's pretty crazy to us how much this storm affected our area this far south. It was that surge. I heard on the news that while meteorologists are getting really good at predicting paths of hurricanes, it is still really difficult to predict the real storm surge. (Here is a pretty helpful explanation of storm surge, better than what I posted yesterday, I think.) That is definitely true here. I think I heard we got 5 feet of storm surge, which doesn't sound too bad. But that above the normal high tide on top of an already saturated Sanibel means flooding. 

We were able to walk around our house and property yesterday afternoon and are thankful to report we stayed dry. It seems that our entire street stayed dry inside. To say we were relieved and thankful is a complete understatement, especially as we continue to learn of more and more friends who took on water inside their homes. I think the least amount of water we heard someone got inside was 4 inches and the most was 2 feet. Ugh. The good news is that most folks have power and water and can immediately start cleaning things up before real structural damage can happen. And I'm also hearing that there is little to no mud to remove from inside. That's another huge difference from Ian. I think everyone also tried to remediate from Ian by making their lower levels easier to clean should flooding happen again (as it did). For example, some of our friends replaced regular floor/drywall areas with Durock, which is easy to hose down. 

It seems there's another storm brewing in the Gulf. So we watch and we wait and we prepare. Thanks to everyone who has checked in on us and shown us such great love & support. We are grateful for you!

Hurricane Helene

Greetings from Southwest Florida. We wanted to post an update regarding Hurricane Helene. As many of you know, this hurricane slammed into the Florida coast up near Big Bend/Tallahassee area. While we didn't get hit by the hurricane, we were affected by storm surge. (This is what caused the majority of flooding we experienced during Hurricane Ian, which incidentally happened two years ago tomorrow.)

We were here in Ft. Myers for the storm and had rising water in our back yard from the nearby waterway. We never lost power and the water never rose to be a threat. We are so thankful for that. This house has yet again served as our lifeboat. 

Reports from friends on Sanibel are that there was lots of flooding. Again. Lots of water in homes. Our neighbor across Periwinkle said they got 16 inches. Unbelievable. She peeked in our house this morning and said it looked dry, which is nothing short of a miracle. I dare to hope. We head over there soon to assess the situation. (As some of you know, we were about to list that house for sale next week.)

There's something bigger at play here. As my mom would say, "What's happening isn't what's going on." Our story from the last two years post-Ian has been one of grief, letting go...hope and faith. I couldn't sleep last night. I had a huge knot in my stomach about what was happening yet again on our beloved Sanibel. But rather than get lost in my "future-tripping," I chose to stay present and grounded right where I was (thanks, Onsite). So I played some of my NY Times word games. Wordle is one of my favorites. (Spoiler alert...) Low and behold, as I'm trying words, the answer emerges. FAITH. I let out a cry. I confess that faith has been hard for me these last couple of years as I have ground myself into exhaustion trying to do everything myself, carry everyone myself. But it's been something I've been trying to reclaim. I am a person of faith. So as I crawled back into bed to try and get a few more hours of sleep, I kept picturing that Wordle, not knowing what waits for us on Sanibel, and choosing faith, knowing that this doesn't mean everything at our house is fine, but knowing I trust the God who has provided faithfully for us through these last very difficult years. For my whole life, in fact. 

Our 15-year-old went outside to check the water line in the back yard this morning and quickly ran back in. "There are otters on the dock!" What?? I am immediately transported back in time to the pandemic. It was April 2020 and I was doing an online writing workshop with my cousin, trying to process all that was happening. Otters showed up in our backyard, playing without a worry on their minds. This is the poem I wrote in response to that:

The Morning the River Otters Came to Play in My Backyard on Sanibel Island (April 2020)

There is a pandemic
but they didn’t know; they came to play
anyway on a Tuesday morning.
My smallest child & I lie in bed chattering
when my husband motions for us to Come!
My feet, not yet ready for the day, scream
Snap! Crackle! Pop!
as I step toward the window. Otters! Otters??
Two balls of fur rolling and tumbling for a few short minutes.
We gasp in wonder.
Then they are gone.
My faith is renewed.

I don't think it's a coincidence that God sent otters to us this morning. "My faith is renewed." So we head to Sanibel this morning in faith, ready to face whatever awaits, knowing we can trust in a God is sovereign. We will post another update as soon as we can.

UPDATE 1: We are currently unable to go over to Sanibel. The causeway is only open to emergency personnel. They hope to open it later today. 

UPDATE 2: Our neighbor just went into our house on Sanibel. It's completely dry on the lower level, even the garage. And the power is on. Praise God! I have been crying tears of relief and thankfulness. Kyle is still going over today to put eyes on everything as soon as the causeway opens.

 

Christmas Letter 2023

It's hard for me to believe another year has passed and Christmas is upon us. Last year at this time, we were still reeling from being hit by a massive hurricane that upended our lives. A year and three months later finds us still in Fort Myers. Sanibel is recovering beautifully, both our house and the island. Friends are moving back. Businesses and beaches are reopening. The green foliage is returning. But something broke for us last year on September 28, and we find ourselves still praying about moving back to Sanibel.

I don't want this Christmas letter to be a hurricane update. In many ways, it feels like old news. And yet, the full impact of the hurricane continues to affect us. The physical impact came first followed by the emotional and psychological impact. We thank God that we have friends, family and lots of helpers walking this road with us. We thank God that our kids are ok and doing well overall. We thank God for our Sanibel community as well as our growing Fort Myers community.

So here's the quick family update: This last year has found us in some wonderful places including Costa Rica for the first time in April. We saw sloths and loads of monkeys and amazing leaf cutter ants and so many other amazing things. We had a fun time with K's family in Sarasota at the beach early this year. We went to South Africa with some of our very best friends and their kids (18 of us in total)! We spent some wonderful time with my family at my folks' house on their beautiful lake. L graduated from 8th grade and is now a freshman in high school. He ran cross country this year and did a great job getting up for all of those early morning runs. He also really enjoyed his 8th grade trip to Washington, DC. H is in 7th grade and enjoyed cheerleading again this fall and is still really enjoying theater. She's doing great in school and enjoying her friends. R enjoyed an epic birthday surrounded by friends (swimming, Nerf battle, giant waterslide) at our home on Sanibel; we made up for not being able to properly celebrate last October thanks to Hurrucane Ian. He's doing great in third grade and is really enjoying his friends. He loves science and math and all things Lego. The boys are still in Boy Scouts on Sanibel. K is still enjoying working with Ball Project and all of his amazing partners there. He faithfully ran with the high school cross country team to support L and the other kids. And he's enjoying time with friends both here and elsewhere. I started library school this fall at Syracuse University (an MS in Library and Information Science), which stretched me in a zillion ways including how to do school asynchronously. And while I loved it, I'm taking a leave of absence to focus on some more immediate things. (I'm not sure my timing was great on that decision...)

Last night, we watched one of our favorite Christmas movies called Nativity! There's a song in it called "One Night, One Moment." (You can listen to it here.) There was one night, one moment last year that changed everything for our family. And there was one night, one moment 2,000 years ago that changed everything for all of us. The connection of these moments is not lost on me. A line in that song says "we'll never be lonely again." And while I think we all still feel lonely sometimes, I do believe we are never alone because Emmanuel is here. God is with us. Merry Christmas, everyone. May you truly find hope in this season. 

Ride the Wave

This past April we had the opportunity to travel to Costa Rica for the first time. One of K's life-long dreams has been to take surfing lessons in Costa Rica. So we did! All of us! It was such fun being in the water all together, experiencing something like surfing, watching each other be able to ride the waves in to the shore!

This has been one of the hardest years of my life, for sure, and I think our lives. Every now and then, huge waves crash on me and I'm overwhelmed (again) by the many losses this season has brought our family & our community.

Shauna Niequist is one of my favorite authors. I was reading in her book, Savor, this morning and was moved. What she writes is so appropriate for what this season has been for us:

"I learned about waves when I was little, swimming in Lake Michigan in navy blue water under a clear sky, and what I learned was this: if you try to stand and face the wave, it will smash you to bits, but if you trust the water and let it carry you, there's nothing sweeter. [...] If you dig in and fight the changes, they will smash you to bits. They'll hold you under, drag you across the rough sand, scare and confuse you. But if you can, in the wildest of seasons, just for a moment, trust in the goodness of God, who made it all and holds it all together, you'll find yourself drawn along to a whole new place, and there's truly nothing sweeter. Unclench your fists, unlock your knees and the door to your heart, take a deep breath, and begin to swim. Begin to let the waves do their work in you."

The layers of sadness our family is experiencing around this hurricane are deep and complicated and they resurface in huge, heavy, wet waves. But this picture that Shauna paints for me this morning is profound. Rather than face the wave head-on, I'm at the minimum standing still, holding my breath, and going under, allowing the wave to pass over me. But if I can be brave enough, I need to actually turn and start swimming and let the waves push me and carry me to a new place.

8 Months Later...

It's crazy that Hurricane Ian hit Sanibel & Fort Myers 8 months ago on May 28. And now, 8 months post-Ian, we're preparing to move back to Sanibel. Much of the island is coming back together. It's starting to green up. More and more friends are moving home. So much progress has been made. And yet there's still such a very long way to go. Many are still waiting on insurance checks in order to move forward. Our house mid-island that flooded should be torn down any time now. It's like the island is trying to swallow the house...the grasses and vines and native flowers are all taking over. That whole part of the island is still so derelict and feels so much like the wild west. So different than other parts of the island.

Now, as we prepare to head back to Sanibel, we just entered the 2023 hurricane season. Sigh. I look at the thunderstorm raging outside right now and it has a name. Tropical Depression Arlene is moving through the Gulf over two hundred miles west of Fort Myers. It's not anticipated to become a hurricane as it heads to Cuba. But I can't help but sit here and wonder, "Will a storm ever just be a storm again?" I pray we become braver, stronger, and smarter as we enter hurricane season again. I'm working on making documents for all of us for what steps we need to take should we need to evacuate again. What did we do right last time? What do we need to do differently? Who's in charge of what? 

And so it is as we march into our summer break. Time doesn't stop and life goes on. We are all tired from this past year. Major things have happened for good and for bad. The kids are growing. L just graduated 8th grade and is now a high school freshmen. H is in 7th grade. And R is in 3rd grade. They've grown so much and have come so far in this last year. We are so proud of them, such beautiful human beings. 

Thanks to all of you for walking this journey with us both near and far. We are thankful for you! I'll post some photos here soon.

Hurricane Update #8

March 28 of this month is the 6-month mark since Hurricane Ian ravaged our community. It's hard for me to believe we haven't slept in our house one time in the last six months. But things are slowly but surely being put back together. We drove over to the Palm Lake house today for the first time in a couple of months. It was the first time taking the kids with us. They surprised be by not being that upset at how bad it looks. They were able to peek inside the windows and see all of the black mold and the collapsed kitchen bar. H salvaged a playing piece from Candyland and some Legos that were in the front yard. She also found some beautiful wild beach daisies that are now growing in our yard there. Made me smile. I included a photo of her below in front of the house. We're at the stage that we're preparing to demo that house. It still makes me so sad, but in the end, it's just a house. The memories aren't going anywhere.

Our home on the east end of the island where we now live is coming back together slowly but surely. My folks have actually been living in it for a couple of months this winter and have been able to witness the restoration of internet (woo-hoo) and electricity in our lower level (double woo-hoo). Which now means yet another phase of fixing can begin...and that means we're getting closer to us moving back. 

The relief workers continue to amaze me. I have a new appreciation for FEMA and the amazing work disaster relief organizations do. Our little island, while devoid still of much vegetation, is amazingly clean...the piles and piles of debris, both plant & household, are nearly all gone. Our bike paths and streets are looking more normal. Sanibel has opened at least two beaches. Restaurants are opening/reopening. The Sanibel School is back in session. Our friends are moving back home. Life is coming back to Sanibel in many beautiful ways. I'm rather in awe at it all. 

Our plan is still to wait to move back until the end of the school year. But we hope to start spending more weekends at home in the coming weeks. 

Thanks for your continued thoughts & prayers. 

k+mb

Here's a recent photo of our banyan tree and our new hedge. What a difference. Here's a photo of the banyan right after the hurricane. Amazing what 5 months does...

Christmas Letter 2022

 To all our dear friends & family,

A very Merry Christmas to you! It's been quite a year, to say the least. The year has been filled with visits from family and friends, which is always a highlight for us. We also were visited by lots of dolphins and manatee. We had chocolate swims (night swimming), loads of ice cream, not to mention all of our first cases of Covid (minus K who had gotten Covid back in 2020). I spent some time with my dear friend for a girls' weekend in Naples, the kids made lots of movies, L captured some amazing images with his drone, and H learned to do back handsprings in gymnastics. We spent a neat weekend in St. Augustine with our homeschool group as well as overnights in St. Petersburg and of course Legoland...some of our favorite FL spots. H was in performances of The Lion King and Annie at the local theater.

We spent spring break in Iceland, which was absolutely amazing. So many amazing people and vistas to experience. We saw black beaches, a glacier, geysers, whales, a volcano, and even a few northern lights, not to mention some excellent museums. We celebrated (with a few tears on my part) the end of our homeschooling experience, bittersweet to be sure. We transitioned quickly into summer with trips to Indiana and Michigan, New York City with most of my side of the family, and North Carolina where we all experienced our first alpine roller coaster, tree-to-tree zipline experience, and hikes up to waterfalls and on to rock plateaus. All three of our kids decided to get baptized this summer at my folks' lake house, which is super special. We love that they each made this decision for their own reasons. Being at the lake with both of our sets of parents and lots of family made it extra special. L also celebrated the big 1-3 at the lake (and at the farm). It was a very exciting trip to be sure! K & I enjoyed a trip to Louisville with his brothers and wives for a few days. I have learned that I definitely do like Louisville but don't like bourbon. So lots of fun trips this year.

All three kids started school this year and are doing really great. I will be the first to admit that they run a much tighter ship than I did in our homeschool, thankfully, which made the transition for R into second grade tough. But all three kids have proven their strength and grit through some tough things this year, and we're really proud of each one of them. 

Quick kid updates:

L is 13 and finding he has quite a knack for all things techie. He's proving to be quite good at filmmaking and photography, an interest he's had for a while now but has become much more sophisticated in this year. He's still an avid reader and pianist and has chosen cross-country and tennis for his school sports. We've also added golf to that list this winter. He is kind and thoughtful and has a huge heart for the wanting to help many global issues. Eighth grade is proving to be much harder than seventh as they get the kids ready for high school next year (!!). He's looking forward to his DC trip at the end of this school year.

H is 11 and is beautiful and creative and a peacemaker. She has transitioned into 6th grade wonderfully. She loved cheerleading this fall and is trying to decide between lacrosse & track and field for her spring sport. (She and L are doing golf and tennis on the side since they didn't choose a winter sport at school.) She chose trumpet for her instrument this year and is starting to enjoy playing it now that she's figured out the "buzz." She's finding an interest in theater and enjoying doing that with friends.

R is 8 and doing great in his new school environment, especially now that he's figured out the 2nd grade classroom rhythms. He's a great friend to his buddies and enjoys seeing them every day. I'm learning a lot about him and his preferences. For instance, he likes to be on time and prepared, and he is very organized. His reading is coming along really well, and we are so thankful for his teachers and reading specialist who got him over the hump of "learning to read" and into "reading to learn." He's playing tennis and golf; I thinks he likes golf best.  

They're all doing great, and we're so thankful for that. Our last trip this fall was to Disney World. It was our first trip there, and it was definitely a memorable experience. We had to cut our trip a day short because Tropical Storm Ian was turning into a hurricane, and we wanted to get home to do some hurricane prep. We spent Monday of that week securing the chickens' food & water, getting the guineas all settled inside, bringing in outdoor furniture, taking down the hammocks, filling jugs of water, and making sure our little generators were all charged. We were just going to ride out the storm because, really, how bad could this hurricane be? We woke up Tuesday morning to an evacuation notice. Mandatory evacuation for the whole island. So we packed our duffels for about 3 days and headed to Naples, hoping it would be far enough away from the worst of the storm.

You all know the rest of the story. (If you don't, go back in this blog history and you can read our account of Hurricane Ian.) September 28 changed everyone's life in SW Florida. That hurricane upended our lives and so many lives around us. Three days away from Sanibel has turned into two months and counting. We thank God for his protection of our family and of our home and it's most precious contents. But the layers of loss are so, so staggering. We are still reeling from the weight of it all, still trying to learn from it all, still trying to find the goodness in it (and there is goodness). Earlier this week, I was on the phone with a power washing company, and the woman I was talking to was so concerned when she learned the job was on Sanibel. She asked how we were doing, and I said "ok." And she said, "There's nothing ok about this." And she's right. I've told a few folks, "I'm fine but not ok," which actually says it better. 

After Hurricane Ian, we were overwhelmed by friends from Indy and around the country and around the world, reaching out to us & sending us prayers, encouragement, gifts. It was incredible. Neighbors of some of our extended family sent our kids presents (and we have never met those neighbors!). Friends sent our kids gift cards and Lego and food. Restaurants gave us free food. It was humbling and overwhelming. And it made us very thankful and made us feel very loved.

We don't know when we'll move back to Sanibel. We are living in Ft Myers a few minutes from the kids' school and will stay until we feel it makes sense for us to go back to Sanibel. While our house is now livable and a few friends are moving back and some businesses are starting to open again (all wonderful), we still don't feel it's time for us to go back. We are waiting.

In my favorite Advent book, Watch for the Light, Henri Nouwen writes about "Waiting for God." He writes, "Waiting is not a very popular attitude. Waiting is not something that people think about with great sympathy. In fact, most people consider waiting a waste of time. Perhaps this is because the culture in which we live is basically saying, 'Get going! Do something! Show you are able to make a difference! Don't just sit there and wait!' For many people, waiting is an awful desert between where they are and where they want to go. And people do not like such a place. They want to get out of it by doing something. In our particular historical situation, waiting is even more difficult because we are so fearful. [...] The more afraid we are, the harder waiting becomes. [...] It impresses me, therefore, that all the figures who appear on the first pages of Luke's Gospel are waiting. Zechariah and Elizabeth are waiting. Mary is waiting. Simeon and Anna, who were there at the temple when Jesus was brought in, are waiting. [...] And right at the beginning all those people in some way or another hear the words, 'Do not be afraid. I have something to say to you.'"

We are waiting, and listening, and paying attention, trying to live expectantly. We have received the promise that God loves us and cares for us and wants the best for us. So we wait with a sense of promise that God is doing something bigger than what we can see. In this way, these promises allow us to wait. Not just for wisdom on when to move back to Sanibel. But for wisdom regarding our role in it all, what it means for our family & our kids. As Nouwen continues, he describes waiting as active. "Active waiting means to be present fully to the moment, in the conviction that something is happening where you are and that you want to be present to it." He also describes waiting as open-ended: "Open-ended waiting is hard for us because we tend to wait for something very concrete, for something that we wish to have. Much of our waiting is filled with wishes. [...] We are full of wishes, and our waiting easily gets entangled in those wishes. [...] We want the future to go in a very specific direction, and if this does not happen we are disappointed and can even slip into despair. [...] But Zechariah, Elizabeth, and Mary were not filled with wishes. They were filled with hope. Hope is something very different. Hope is trusting that something will be fulfilled, but fulfilled not just according to our wishes." 

This is all not only highly applicable to this post-hurricane season we are in but to all of life. It's how we want to live our lives. Expectant of what God has in store, seeing the blessings around us, being thankful for those blessings, and knowing He is at work at doing what is more magnificent than our minds can imagine. We wait, we watch, and we send our kids to school and make meal plans for the week and have coffees with friends and clean up the muck and mire that this hurricane has left behind. And we do it together. And it's really hard work and I sometimes cry when I least expect it. And I laugh when I sometimes least expect it. And that's life, right? 

So, as we celebrate Advent and live with joy in anticipation of all that God has in store for us, we remember you, our family and friends, who have walked faithfully beside us through these tough days. I wrote so much about the good that has happened this year because I need to remember the good; it's been a really good year. I don't want to lose sight of that in the wake of the hurricane. Your prayers, cards, gifts, and conversations have been life-giving, breath-giving on the days when I feel the breath has completely left me. Thank you for your love. 

We wish you all a very Merry Christmas! Blessings to you all as we finish 2022 and enter a brand new year. Godspeed, be thankful and keep up the good work.

All our love,

K, M, L, H, R and the Wonderdogs and the Guineas

(First six photos are from Iceland. The rest are from everything else.)

Hurricane Update #7

Life continues to move forward here in Florida. We hear more and more stories of devastation and sadness. But we also hear more and more stories of hope and restoration. This is good. We are trying to focus on the positive! 

Speaking of positive, we have power back at our house! Our amazing friend, T, is here helping so many of us. He was over at our house on November 5 and texted this photo of our meter running. He wrote, "And we have power!" H and I were at a play watching her friend perform. I received his text during intermission and just started crying right there and then. Again, another level of relief overcame me. He then sent a photo of the back of our house lit up. It's one of the more beautiful sights I've seen lately.

These photos come to us a week after K and I went back to our Palm Lake house to do a walk-through after another amazing friend, Y, cleared all of the furniture and debris and mud out of the house and from around the property, no small job. With everything out of the house, we were able to see that the foundation did indeed shift, in some places as much as six inches. It's unbelievable to us. We knew it was a tear-down, but this confirmed it for me. This is a photo from our guest room of the floor... and another of the guest bedroom...the towel is still hanging!

I'm going to close with two things: 

First, I have been doing the first two lessons of The Viewfinder Project, What is Ugly and What is Beautiful, with some of my friends here as we process all that has transpired. I know it's been good for me, and I hope it's been good for them. We're finishing up on Monday with a writing session led by my very talented cousin, Kelsea. There are so many layers of emotions, so many layers of loss and grief. So we're trying to name some of that and work through it to the other side. It's hard work. Continue to keep us all in your prayers.

Second, I've been reading an Anne Lamott book called, Stitches, which K gave me years ago but I pulled off the shelf because it seemed timely. Here's an excerpt that has been meaningful for me:

"[...] most of us have figured out that we have to do what's in front of us and keep doing it. We clean up beaches after oil spills. We rebuild whole towns after hurricanes and tornadoes. We return calls and library books. We get people water. Some of us even pray. Every time we choose the good action or response, the decent, the valuable, it builds, incrementally, to renewal, resurrection, the place of newness, freedom, justice. The equation is: life, death, resurrection, hope. The horror is real, and so you make casseroles for your neighbor, organize an overseas clothing drive, and do your laundry. You can also offer to do other people's laundry, if they have recently had any random babies or surgeries. We live stitch by stitch, when we're lucky."

Love to you all.

Hurricane Update #6

 Hi everyone,

It's been a minute since I've posted because it's been a whirlwind of days that met into weeks. The kids went back to school on October 17 after an almost 3-week hiatus. The city opened the causeway up to residents earlier than planned on October 19. That day, we dropped the kids at school and drove over. I took video footage of it all. This was only my second time to the island after the hurricane, my first time to see first hand what Sanibel really looks like. (The first time, we boated straight to our dock, went into the house, got back on the boat. And at that stage, most people hadn't started remediation at all.) The little bridge going over a canal between the causeway and our house is broken in two spots, so we had to go the long way around. Truly, the photos don't do it justice. To see every house...every house...with most of its contents out on the curb is haunting. Roofs were stuck in trees. Everything was where it wasn't supposed to be. It reminds me of a twisted version of that Dr. Seuss story, Wacky Wednesday. 

That Saturday, we decided to drive the kids over to see Sanibel and see our house. We were all heeding Mr. Roger's mother's words and were looking for the helpers. (They were everywhere.) We couldn't help but marvel at how cars got where they were, how entire houses shifted to new locations. They loved being back at our house with their things. With the car, we were all able to gather more clothes and personal belongings. It was good for all of us to see exactly why we can't move back to Sanibel right now and probably not for a while. 

The good news is that the water is back on most places for cleaning/washing. We can even flush toilets and wash hands, which feels remarkable to me. We keep hearing reports that various friends have power to their homes already too, which is also great. We're anxiously awaiting news that our electrical system at the house is in good enough shape to reconnect to the grid. Hopefully that will happen next week. 

On Tuesday morning, K and I got in the car and drove back to Sanibel. This time, though, we headed to our home on Palm Lake Drive. We were meeting the flood insurance adjuster there. This would be our first time to see firsthand how that house had fared. I'm so thankful we saw it together because it was terrible. Tears just started flowing as we approached Bailey's and headed south on Tarpon Bay Rd. More tears as we turned onto West Gulf Drive. Tears as we drove by Shalimar, which is no longer there. Tears as we drove by the little church on the corner of Palm Lake, which didn't make it. And tears as we turned the corner onto our street and saw so much of Island Inn Resort from across the street in our front yard. We couldn't walk to the front door. So much mud. Still. And now, nearly a month after the hurricane and no open windows, mold growing up our walls. The house literally is falling apart inside. I don't want to post many photos of all of that because so many of you have been to that house and I don't want to spoil the memory you have of it. The foundation of the house actually cracked. And shifted about 1/2 inch. It will need to come down. Soon, I'm going to ask any of you who spent time in that house to send me a few photos of you there...I'm going to put together a photo album of that special spot that has always been a thin place for us, a sanctuary. L had his first Christmas there, all the kids learned to ride their bikes on that loop, H recovered from her skull surgery there...so, so many memories. And the memories go back even farther than us. We bought that house from our friends, the Fishers, who filled it with friends and family and memories too. I'm so sad it's gone.

In closing for now, I'm posting a photo of one of the many bizarre things we saw at that house. The book laying in the mud was on the far side of the living room, away from the kitchen. Somehow, that spatula got itself stuck in the book and landed upright. And there is sits. I couldn't resist snapping a photo. I’m also including a photo of our banyan tree at our house...it’s already sprouting new leaves! 

Thanks to all for your continued prayers and texts and emails checking in. We are finding our footing in our new digs and are thankful school is back in session. These are bringing stability and a sense of place.

Hugs,
mb&k

Hurricane Ian Update #5

Things seem to be moving so fast. They opened up the Causeway on Tuesday for a million repair trucks. It's pretty unbelievable. And they are scheduled to open up the Causeway to residents on October 21, which is also unbelievable. We are so thankful. In case you haven't seen the footage on social media or in the news, here are some links if you want to see the video footage of the convoy arriving on Sanibel:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oVx9x49EFNc

 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DqZmsM6fYwg

We are tired but hopeful. There are still so many families in need of help, so many families still in Hertz arena waiting for direction on what to do next. Keep praying for all involved.

Hugs to you all.

Hurricane Ian Update #4

Thank you, thank you, thank you to each and every one of you that made R's 8th birthday so very special!! It was such a sweet day! He started receiving packages and cards before his birthday, then on his birthday, then yesterday too. Wow. We made pancakes for breakfast. He then went on his scavenger hunt for his gifts, a tradition in our house (though the clues were made by a very tired momma), opened gifts, then went to look at a house in Fort Myers that might be ours to live in until we can move back home to Sanibel. Then back to Naples for pizza dinner and cookie cake with friends. It was a good day. He/we felt so loved on and showered by gifts (for L & H & us too!) and calls. He even received lots of video messages and photos of handmade cards from his friends at school! I've posted a few photos from the day at the bottom of this post.

It feels like months since the hurricane, not weeks. Every day is long and full of changing information and plans. We're hoping to be settled into a new place by the end of the month. So much to do before that, though. School starts on October 17, which will be good...get those routines going again. We're so thankful for the school community, for the administration and teachers who, despite going through their own craziness, are there for our kids. It's all so amazing. So thankful for all of the helpers.

I'm feeling a deep sense of weariness setting in...so I'm praying for the energy to get through the days ahead. We also have a sick dog, though we don't know what's wrong. She has had a bad cough since mid-August and has been on a cough med and an antibiotic in addition to her normal allergy meds. But the medicine has run out, our vet on Sanibel is unreachable, and I can't get her meds refilled without being seen. There are so many animals that need more immediate attention, so it's been difficult to get her in to see anyone. Praying about all of that too. 

Thanks for all of your continued prayers and support. We're hanging in there and will be fine. K keeps reminding me that it's a marathon not a sprint...Hugs to all of you!

Hurricane Ian Update #3

Thanks to all of you who were praying as we went over to Sanibel today. It was an early start. No problems getting on the island. Just showed our driver's license to the police stationed by our canal entrance and headed in. I had seen lots of photos of everything thanks to K, so I wasn't too shocked by what I saw. A thin layer of mud over the entire lower level. Mold already starting inside drawers and toy containers with anything wood. It's crazy. I'm thankful K and Todd are working so hard over there to remove the wet & rotting materials. My main job was to attack the playroom...keep as much Lego as possible. And if you know us, we have a lot of Lego. (Such teeny, tiny pieces!!) The Critters all pretty much had to be tossed. The costume bin miraculously remained bone dry as did a few other bins.

The hardest part of this whole thing is really the displaced feeling. We feel we are camping out, trying to unpack, trying to settle, all the while not knowing how long we'll really be out of our home. The stuff in the house is just that...stuff. And we can replace lots of the ruined things. But it's the feeling of losing home. K always has said, "Home is where the hounds are." And we have our hounds and guineas and of course our three awesome kids. So I know "home" is where they are. But I've always been a person whose physical space and place can be a "thin place." And our home on Sanibel is just that. We moved in to this house just over a year ago. Did some work inside. Built a dock outside. We literally just finished our big landscape project the week before the hurricane. I don't think I was holding on to it all too tightly. But sometimes I wonder.

We're hearing lots of encouraging reports that there will soon be a temporary bridge for residents and workers who will get to work rebuilding and getting power and water on. It all just takes time, we know. And we're thankful for the movement in this direction. K has been a machine...getting so much done for us, for our house, for our friends. I admire him and love him so very much. I'm so thankful I have a steady partner through this.

My dad has this saying: Absorb chaos, give back calm, provide hope. We are trying to live that. Big time. But it's very, very tiring absorbing all the chaos while remaining calm and giving back hope.

So that's where I am tonight. I'm tired yet encouraged yet left wondering at it all. So many have lost so much more. I try to see the beauty in things. I try to see the good. I definitely see God. My friend L texted me, "I'm glad you are seeing the beauty in all of this." I told her I didn't really see the beauty but I can definitely see God at work. And she responded, "God is beauty, and you are seeing Him." Made me cry.

Hugs to you all tonight. We look forward to seeing you sometime soon and once again be able to host you in our Sanibel home.

Hurricane Ian Update #2

It's been six days since Hurricane Ian visited us here in SW Florida. It's been a crazy roller coaster of a week. The short of it is that residents are allowed on to the island by private vessel starting tomorrow, curfew of 7am to 7pm. Praise God. K and I are heading there tomorrow, possibly accompanied by our talented & generous builder of a friend, TW. I'll try to post a few photos once I get to lay eyes on everything myself. But we'll be working hard to rid the lower level of anything that mold likes...

Going backwards for a minute...During the storm, we played games, read stories, hooked a portable DVD player up to our little generator and watched a movie. But in the end, K just couldn't focus and just sat by the front door watching the water rise. He was watching and waiting, watching the levels to see when we'd need to move to the next level up because the water might come into the house. The water flooded the street, crept up the mailbox posts, entered the driveway and eventually into the garage. Up the first step to the front door. It was rising so fast. Then it stopped. Then it receded. Then we could actually see the grass again, proof that my eyes weren't deceiving me.

We got power back here at the house in Naples Thursday late afternoon. K immediately went to the back patio and raised the hurricane shutters. The light of the beautiful sunset poured into the room that had been the darkest during the storm. I delighted in it then immediately started weeping. Weeping with relief; weeping with grief. 

I've often thought of the Bible story of Noah and the flood, and especially thought of it during this hurricane. One of our good friends and favorite musicians, Jeff Black, wrote a song called "Noah's Ark." He plays it for me every time he plays at our house concerts. It has always been a favorite of mine, always has moved me. I listened to it this morning and wept. Again. Take a moment and listen. It might just be the theme song for this moment in time:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0SjfhyDL4z0

We love you and are beyond thankful for all of you and your kind words, your encouragement, your prayers. You have carried us. This would be too heavy without God & you. Bitter. Sweet. They go together. 

To be continued...

Hurricane Ian Update #1 (addendum)

Every day reveals more about all that is happening. I just heard a report from a city meeting that the current plan is to have a plan for the causeway in 30 days, and have the causeway fixed in a year. A year? 

I know Sanibel is a tourist destination where lots of the devastation was to people's second homes. But it's also home to a lot of people whose everything was there. Their livelihood, their only home. So if you know people who may look at the losses on Sanibel and think, well, "it was just a tourist destination" or "if people lived there they can afford to live somewhere else," please remind them that it was so much more for so many people. 

If I'm honest, I fear that Sanibel will be deemed totaled and beyond repair and put out to the curb in order to focus on the losses on the mainland. Please say a prayer that won't happen, if not for us then for all the families who have lost everything and have to rebuild their lives and livelihoods.

One more note regarding our family....Our sweet baby, R, turns 8 next Friday. Poor kid is just trying to figure out how to celebrate his birthday and who he can be with. If you want to send him a card, text me and I'll give you the address of where we're staying. Hugs to you all!

Hurricane Ian Update #1

 To our dear friends and family,

Thank you so much to all of you for all of your emails, texts, and phone calls as you check in with us after Hurricane Ian ravaged SW Florida. We evacuated Sanibel on Tuesday afternoon and have been safely hunkered down in Naples, FL at K's parents' house. We have two dogs and three guinea pigs with us. Sadly, we had to leave our four chickens behind. We thought we'd be gone 3, maybe 4 days and packed accordingly. Thankfully, I had the kids pack their most precious lovies; I had the sense somehow to grab the passports, external hard drives, and journals that I've kept for the kids since they were babies.

September 28 was one of the longest days of our lives. We literally sat in the dark watching the streets here in Naples fill with water, slowly making its way into the garage, praying it wouldn't rise the 3-feet into the house, all the while wondering what this hurricane was doing to our community on Sanibel. 

We didn't have power for about 36 hours, which means we had very intermittent satellite connections for our phones. We had no idea about all that was happening in the SW Florida until late yesterday when the power finally came back on and we could finally see images. It's all incredibly heartbreaking and overwhelming.

Late last night, K found out he had an opportunity to get on a boat with a few friends and head over to Sanibel to check on the house. He left here at 6:30am, bringing a short list of things to grab to bring back with him. (FYI, evacuation lists don't generally have "school bags" on them! So some school binders/notebooks were on that list.) While he was gone, some friends sent through the link to satellite images of the damage; I could see that we had a roof, that our boat was still on the lift (we thought all the boats had floated away), and the rv was still in the driveway. We also learned that the Sanibel lighthouse was still standing (we thought it had blown down). All good news.

After a very long day, K returned around 4pm with pictures and news. We learned:

-The lower level of our home flooded and is wrecked; about 4-5 feet of water entered our lower level.
-Our landscaping took a big beating, including our beautiful, ancient banyan tree which has lost at least a third of its mass/branches.
-The upper two floors of the house are totally fine and intact.
-No windows or doors are broken.
-And, miraculously, 3 of 4 chickens survived. They are now free to roam Sanibel to their hearts content...

Unfortunately, our other house (that many of you have been to) over on Palm Lake Drive is ruined, irreparable. At least 5 feet of sea water filled that one-story house. That's our personal bad news. But the bad news continues to come in regarding friends' homes. It's all so terrible. And even what survived is at risk of mold and rot beyond remediation. Sanibel will never be the same.

But we trust that a new Sanibel is coming. I've never seen so many resilient people and spirits. It's awe-inspiring. When I see footage online of all the helpers, I start crying every time. People are bringing food and water to the rescue teams; they are working hard to continue to evacuate people. 

I can't help but count the blessings in our lives despite the tragedy, find the sweet alongside the bitter, as my sister-in-law reminded me.

I'm grateful:
-For the angels who have blessed us immensely (Noah, Todd, Wess, and the countless friends and family who have checked on us and encouraged us)
-That we have a safe place to stay as long as we need to
-That K has such a great sense of humor
-That we're all healthy after a month of struggling with health
-For so many digital photos so I don't need to worry about salvaging paper photos
-That the kids are taking all of this in stride and rolling with the massive changes amazingly well

Thanks for sticking with me through the end of this post. I'm sorry for the impersonal nature of this update. But I am the world's worst and slowest texter and this is the easiest way to give a detailed update to the most people and not be on our phone's all day amidst still-spotty service.

We will be happy to continue to respond personally to texts, emails and phone calls. But wanted to get this update out sooner than later. Thank you for all of your thoughts and prayers. Our prayers continue to go out to our friends and community who were impacted in such tremendous ways.

K wants to add...As the great theologian John Lennon of the Beatles said, "It will be alright in the end. If it's not alright, it's not the end." And as many angels said many times, "Don't be afraid."

All our love,
K, M, L, H, R and the dogs and guineas

A final prayer:
Those who know us well know how much we rely on the strength of God to guide us through the tough stuff and help us focus on the blessings in our lives. Without Christ, we are nothing. I read a beautiful prayer yesterday morning by one of my favorite authors, Shauna Niequist, from her book Savor in a reading called "Scary Headlines." May we all be full of grace, kindness and faith through whatever challenges we face, big or small. Here is the paraphrased version:

"Deep breath. On the days when I'm tempted to lie down on the ground and let the anxiety I feel about our world flatten me like a steamroller, instead I pray. I speak to God, sometimes out loud, often in the car, frequently in the shower. I ask for help about the things I don't understand. I ask for peace, and grace, and the ability to see outside myself. I pray for people who are at the mercy of the scary headlines...And I pray for the people who can solve these problems. I pray for a way through, a light at the end of the tunnel."

Our front yard after...

Our front yard before...

The crazy things that floated into the pool from our pool deck...

Our driveway...

Christmas Letter 2021

Merry Christmas! Life is starting to look a little bit more like we remember it pre-pandemic as we expand our boundaries bit by bit! Overall, it's been a good year despite the "decision fatigue" I'm sure many of us continue to experience because of the pandemic. It feels like we've lived two years in one, since the second half of the year has felt much more "normal" than the first half of the year.

Our highlights of the year include:

We moved into a new house here on Sanibel! We are much closer to the causeway and back up to a deep-water canal that leads out into the bay. We are enjoying the water, more space, and close proximity to some of the kids' friends. We have loved getting to know "the east end" of the island, though we miss the quiet west end with its abundance of birds & wildlife sightings. 

We've enjoyed trips to Indiana, , Michigan, Legoland, St. Augustine, St. Petersburg, Great Wolf Lodge, Atlanta and Virginia to be with family as we celebrated my uncle's life, and soon-to-be Colorado for Christmas.

L (12 years old) started school this fall. After lots of conversations and even more praying, we made the jump. He's in 7th grade at a school in Ft. Myers called Canterbury (the same name as my brother & nieces school up north in Ft. Wayne) and loves it. We're all pinching ourselves that his first semester is already almost over. He ran cross country this fall and is planning on playing tennis this spring. We're all enjoying getting to know many of the amazing families at his school. He still loves reading, photography & videography, skateboarding & Ripsticking, and playing piano.

H (10 years old) is in fifth grade and doing great. She loves reading, snuggling all the pets (including the three guinea pigs we adopted in August), Ripsticking, gymnastics, dance, chatting with friends, sewing and baking. She remains a peacemaker and convener in our family. She loves adventuring and has been a great catalyst in getting our family out the door again! And she finally got her ears pierced. :)

R (7 years old) is in first grade and is thoughtful & fun & full of spunk and energy. He loves Ripsticking with his siblings and started piano lessons this year. He still is enjoying Boy Scouts (he won the Pine Wood Derby for our troop!) and is always up for an adventure. We've all been getting used to our new school day without L at the table! But we've been enjoying a new Sanibel homeschool co-op as well as lots of Fun Friday events, including Sea School.

K & I celebrated our 20th anniversary this year by going up to St. Augustine and learning to surf! It's been a long-time dream of K's to learn to surf and we both enjoyed it lots! We hope to get the kids surfing sometime next year.

We end the year grateful for family, friends and most definitely each other. Come visit us on Sanibel!

Love & blessings in the new year,

K, M, L, H and R (+ all the animals)